16th of December, a day with quite a regular beginning, but a rainy ending was given to a perfect day. In the middle of my way little did i understand about everything but this thing had in vied a deep scar in my heart.
My 6-year-old kia, jumped on me, grabbed my arm and stayed silent. I knew , she was cross about something.”Hey hon, what’s wrong with you?”I said kissing her forehead.She looked at me with those tiny innocent eyes and said,”Dad school, I don’t want to go, please.” I forced her to go i shouldn’t have had done that.She walked with her arms crossed as i waved her goodbye and drove like usual to my office. At 2, i saw the news in my office ‘attacks on the school’ . My fear had no limits, all i knew is i wanted to reach there, hold her in my arms and make sure she is safe and sound. I reached there, it’s really scary how things change. I could hear everything but those screams. I saw the view over the gate, i sat down and cried. I saw her laying lifeless on the cold dusty ground. Blood dripped down her little stomach and it speckled all over her tiny legs. I could hold myself no longer i knew everything was over. Was there some reason another way up? She laid lifeless, i went to pick my little kid but somehow that lifeless part of me, was just killing me and i couldn’t pick her up. I didn’t bring her up so they could wear her down and shut her up. It nearly killed me when they put her mom in the ground. That smile was the only thing that kept me alive. All i knew is that i wanted to turn it inside out and didn’t want anybody to take it away. I remember your little laughter when i tickled you. I remember the way i first held you in my arms, i thought the heaven just smiled upon me. The way your held my finger with your tiny hand and the way you touched my face. The same hand is now specked with nothing but lifeless dust. I wish in the morning should’ve had turned and whispered a “no.” in your ear. All my blind faith and all my shattered hope just turned into cries with screams and pain with dogma. I wish we could just fly away somewhere together and never come back. That’s all i ask god, to see me through and just give me a moment with you.